life

What is life?
Life is so fragile...

Giving up mood come back today...
I don’t know why?
Feeling want to walk away... from everything...
To some place that no one knows me...
And start it all over again...

I hate myself...
Hating everything that left for me...
I have nothing...
Just a body without soul...

What is the purpose of my life?
I’m searching... still searching...

Sometime... feeling going out will be good...
But... when I reach home is so empty...
The emptiness is killing...
I need something to fill it up///

sunday 16 aug 2009

A good day... even few nights of nightmare...
Had famous hokkien mee from the seven street...
And some other things...

Noon time... some wine... and a nap...
The wine is making me headache...

Very good mood until i saw the msn window... you sign in...
Mmm... have decided to delete you... maybe I just cant imagine that... it just a game...

Stupid me... as I should have knew it from the beginning...

i should have knew it

I should have knew it from the beginning...
Is just for fun...
Maybe I’m too serious... or maybe I’m the fool...

I’m going no where...
Still here...
Getting to know myself... better...
I’m learning now... to equip myself... better armor... so that I would not easily get hurt next time...

Time is killing me... these days... getting blank suddenly... after I finish my thesis... have been trying to plan my timetable... but the table seem to be blank @ this moment...

Moody... I think I need to get drunk...
Dizzy... feeling... uncomfortable ... tired...

I have u... from within my heart...
I hate myself for knowing u...

meh mood...

Collected my thesis today...
And I want to submit it... but the officer seem don’t want to have it now...
Asking me to submit around the due date...
Dang it...


Can’t log in to my facebook...
And this is some sort driving me crazy...

Today is boring...
I have nothing to do after I finish my thesis...
Want to learn something ... or meeting new people...

Dang dang dang dang dang it..............................
My mind… is closing down……

roti

roti eventually is my ex boss from dell...
Recently, understand that he is using me and sandy as an example to warn his current staff not to leave in a meeting...

More elaboration will be: he is saying the below-->
example 1 = Sandy that time she left... said that pressure... acne all over face... but she is back... this is bullshit...
Example 2 = me :) --> Jeff that time convert him to perm... and very the fast he resign... waste my effort... said that the new company offer more paid...
(They come back and the paid will be the same)

One thing to clarify is… if you come back to dell within the 1 year the paid will be the same... but more than one year... it will be different...

And my reaction to his comment is:
WTF... people is coming back is because of other things... a leader that not like YOU... and many other reasons...

I do thank him to convert me... but what the reason he converts me? Is because... I tender the letter... and he is asking me to stay... and offer me a perm position...and I left after 6 months perm... not the very fast as he said…

1st of all... the reason I left is... my paid does not increase... when I get convert... saying diploma is only worth that fucking price...
Secondly... I found out that someone who is also diploma get a better paid than me... and who is a newbie... and that is the reason I’m looking a new job...
And lastly... I do get a better paid @ the new company... additional RM 700 for the basic... and that why I left...

Trying to say a fair thing... is... I do not really care what he said… just
I’m writing this... is for... anyone who is still in dell... maybe can show to roti...
Telling him how and what is the reason behind...

Quote for today: when you are good... there will be lots of follower... when you are bad... maybe those who still haven’t found the solution... they follow you just for the time being...


p/s: next blog will be the bird @ dell...
adios...
muacksss

I'm a fool

WTF mood... in this wonderful Sunday...
Anyhow... I should have get over it...
Is just a stupid fling I had this year...

Will make sure that I will not fall into anyone until I know the person very well...
cheebye...

I wish I can yell @ some1 now... or maybe smack any1 face...

omg... in a terrible mood...
Is the time that I should learn... to have fun... no string attached... maybe...

I’m just a silly little boy...

Today’s plan... out @ noon to rent book... out to tambun @ night to have some crab...
ya... is crapssssssss .... All is crapsssssss... all the talking is just crapSSSSS... if you can’t make it... you better don’t make any promise...

Fuck you...

am i fat?

Met alil this wed...
Mmm... My face seems to getting bigger...
Until... she said that...

Start my weight losing program 2day...
And hopefully... can lose some inch on my face...

Eventually... when i gain weight... the face and the tummy is getting bigger...
Fuck... I just hope my butt can get bigger...

Anyway... cut my hair 2day... a new step... for the new beginning...
And losing the weight is the second step...

Adios...